The only reason that you fight your family is because you don’t want to let them go. You can’t let them go. There is always the belief that we can sort out our problems. There’s always hope of a second chance. Finding happiness is not a lost cause.
I remember reading a book when I was younger. I think it was called ‘The Waterhole.’ Basically, each page would show a picture of animals from a specific country drinking from a waterhole. So the first page would show tigers in India drinking and then the next would show moose from Canada drinking from a waterhole and so forth. Now when I think of this book I think of family. I imagine that the waterhole is like your family. They are a natural source that we as humans need in order to survive. Granted the water level can change, but more often than not, they will always sit there in that same position day after day letting you drink from them. You could be gone for days, even months but that waterhole will still be there. And no matter how far you travel, you will always find your way back to it because it provides you with a sustenance that you need.
Your family is your waterhole. You can fight it as much as you want but you would only be fighting something that you need. Now some of you may be turning from your family because of some sort of falling out. But let me ask you a question:
Regardless of how you feel, do you think about them at least once everyday since your falling out?
My guess is you do. You may argue that you are only thinking about them because you hate them so much. But let me tell you, your hatred is sign. It is a sign that you don’t want to let go of them. That you want the problem to be fixed. That you wish things could be different. And I’m telling you that that is OK. We need our family. Whether its your Mum, Dad, brother, sister, uncle, auntie, cousin, grandfather, grandmother, daughter, son, nephew, niece, step father, step mother. It doesn’t matter, these people are our waterhole. Without them we suffer. I don’t want to go into too much detail, but I’ve seen this suffering. I’ve seen what happens when we don’t forgive. I see it every day. And it pains me.
You have a second chance. Like the waterhole, your family is still there waiting for you. All you have to do is be brave enough to take that first step. It’s not going to be easy but remember: anything worthwhile never comes easy. The path to forgiveness and reconciliation is a difficult one, but I promise that at the end of that path is something great. A chance for you to breathe again. A chance to live again. A chance to be happy again. It starts with you.
Don’t give up on family because they haven’t given up on you.